Tag Archives: disillusion

Thinking for Myself

Knowing is holding a concept that you don’t just have to accept by faith, because you have evidence or facts to back it up — either that, or there is just a knowing deep inside. Sometimes knowing is just having something deep inside that you know is true, but you don’t know why or how you know — you just do. When I started thinking for myself and listening to that still small voice deep inside of my soul, that’s when things began to change, that’s when the blinders came off my eyes! That’s when the bubble that I was inside of burst and I began to see reality for the first time!

After many years there came a point in my journey through life that some things just didn’t seem to be right — things that didn’t match up to what I’d studied in the Bible. It wasn’t me that was changing, but things around me were and it was affecting me. It was as though there was a cross road and something deep down inside was saying: “Change direction”.

Upon returning to the States after years on the mission field, visiting  several different churches was in the itinerary. There was never one that really seemed like home. There were still the wounds from my youth that haunted me. All the pastors and psychologists could never help find the peace that was so longed for. Gradually the realization came to me that the problem wasn’t really with me, it was with Christianity.

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